"You're only young once, but you can be immature forever."
   -Unknown (at least to me)

Latest Column:
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My column is called: "Hey, Guess What?" - that famous phrase that precedes all great stories told by anybody under the age of ten.

I felt it an appropriate name.

I recently turned twenty-five. How is it possible that the entire world now considers me an adult? How can I own a car that my parents didn't have to cosign for? How can I be mature and responsible when I still pretend that my cell phone is a gun?

As I state in The Atari Generation Takes Over, "I have volumes upon volumes of memories involving tag, kickball and chocolate milk, but only four years of 'guess-what-happened-at-work-today' stories.'"

This column is written from the point of view of that guy. The guy who is forever coming to grips with being a "grownup" but just can't get the vivid memories of childhood out of his head. All the wonder, confusion, angst, insecurity and idealism of my childhood and adolescence are revealed in a light but edgy, self-depreciating manor - with a healthy dose of sarcasm thrown in like the adorable little smart-ass that I am.

I have provided two sections:

The Current Favorites section contains some of my personal picks, suitable for any family-oriented publication looking for weekly columns or just humorous filler.

The Archives contains everything, including my less family-friendly columns (don't worry, no BDSM or anything) and a plethora of older pieces (funny and otherwise) that I've written for various e-zines.

If you are a publisher or editor and like what you see, please drop me a line and let's discuss how "Hey, Guess What" might fit in with your publication.