Shooting little people RULES!

Damn I'm whooped. The fam and I just got back from a place in Pennsylvania called Peddler's Village. It's a very toursity place to go and buy lots of crap that you don't really need. Fortunately we didn't go for that reason. They also have a mini-amusement place there for kids called Giggleberry Fair which consists of a merry-go-round, a playroom full of dress up clothes, musical instruments, puppets, etc... But the coup de gras at this place is "Giggleberry Mountain" which is a GIGANTIC contraption made of nets, ropes, tubes, slides, and anything else you can imagine a kid might want to climb. It goes up for six stories!

Lauren and I took turns following Allison up and down this monster obstacle course. I've gotta say this about my kid: that girl is STRONG. She's climbing from level to level like it's nothing, often using nothing more than arm strength to hoist herself up. Because the place was built with little people in mind, it seemed to be harder on the adults than the kids and Allison was often having to wait up for US.

BUT, the best damn thing about this whole place, the thing that makes ME want to go back again and again: on the bottom two levels of Giggleberry Mountain are a series of air canons for firing little NERF-like balls, of which there are literally hundreds scattered here, there and everywhere. On the lower level there are canons that fire large volumes of balls up into the air and on the second level are swivel cannons that you use to fire at opponents on the other side of the well. Or you can do what I did and fire down into the well... into the crowd.

The best part is firing on those kids who have just walked in and don't quite realize what the room is all about. Out of nowhere a little ball suddenly plunks them in the head. They look up like, "What the fuck was that?" When they shrug their shoulders and look away, you blast them again. Seriously, how awesome is that? Where else in America can you go where it's actually okay, and even ENCOURAGED, that you shoot little kids in the head? Nowhere, that's where!

And I just want to say that I think I earned the title of "Funnest Grownup on the Muthafuckin Planet" tonight. Most parents were only shooting at their own kids. Well, my kid was off with her mother climbing nets. So I just started unloading on anyone who was at least six-years-old and within the lateral range of my cannon. At first they'd be like, "Holy crap, was that an adult who just shot me?" But after the second or third direct hit, they smartened up and started returning fire. By the time we finally moseyed on out of this place, I had a good twenty kids all ganging up to blast me with cannons or, when that failed, flinging them like baseballs and cheering like Mardi Gras whenever they pegged me in the face. No kidding, almost every single kid in that well was ignoring every other person at every other cannon and focusing all their firepower on me. It was like being on American Gladiators where I was the Gladiator.

It... was... AWESOME!